Spirituality for Extroverts

Last week, I wrote that I would write about Fr. Tom McDermott, CSC and appreciate the unique and remarkable person that he was.  I have struggled in the attempt – it feels small and incomplete – but I offer the reflection here since the church so desperately needs leaders with Tom’s strengths.  Here are five:

1) Tom’s pastoral default was to go to the margins and learn from the poor.  He did this everywhere he went, including when he moved to Dhaka in his late fifties to begin his final apostolate.  Last year, at the age of 73, on a fundraising trip in New York City, he wrote me that he organized a little “urban plunge” for himself to understand how folks who moved from Bangladesh settled in the New York.  He always knew he would find God at the margins.

2) Tom told me on a few occasions that, if he were to write a book, it would be called Spirituality for Extroverts.  When I made a silent retreat with him in Dhaka, he made sure that I did not get too much quiet – inviting me to visit the Missionaries of Charity house, to visit with this or that community member or interesting guest.  He taught me that if one’s spirituality does not have some aspect of this extroversion, there is something missing.

3) Tom had the virtue of “solertia” in spades – a subset of the cardinal virtue of prudence.  It refers to keen perception and quick practical judgment that allow one to navigate unexpected and/or changing circumstances.  Tom’s ability to size up a situation and quickly act was truly excellent and he often put it in the service of students trying to learn and serve in East Africa or South Asia.  

Humorous example of when he used it in the service of his brothers in Holy Cross: Some years ago, himself in his seventies, Tom volunteered to fly from Dhaka to Chicago with two Holy Cross brothers (themselves an average of 15 years older than Tom) to go home for medical care. Tom navigated Dhaka’s airport with the two aging priests.  Mobility was a true challenge, and stairs were not possible for these men.  Then, nearly on the plane, the three found themselves on the tarmac staring up at one of those giant and only kinda stable portable staircases leading up to their plane.  No elevator.  This was not going to happen for the brothers in his care, so Tom talked his way onto the container that carried the in-flight meals to the plane’s galley.  He brought his brothers home via stacks of chicken dinners.   

4) Tom often wished aloud that, if reincarnation were a thing, he would be blessed to come back as a cultural anthropologist.  He delighted in people and could learn from anyone.

5) Tom understood the mystery of the Cross.  Last year, I recorded this interview with Tom about the Holy Cross motto – The Cross, Our Only Hope.  Do treat yourself to it.  It feels right to give him the final word.

Time-bound

We move back to the United States this coming week.  

Some weeks ago, a friend asked why we were leaving Germany.  I told him that our tour was only two years, and those years are wrapping up.

“Ah,” he said, “so you knew from the beginning that it was all time-bound.” 

I liked how he put that, and have thought about it the days since.  It is true of our time in Germany, and it is true of our time on the earth. 

We know from the beginning that our whole lives are time-bound.  We don’t get forever here. 

While I can appreciate this intellectually, I don’t feel that I really comprehend and internalize it until I am confronted with the pain of it.

Such a moment happened this week, when I was told of the death of a friend and mentor.  Fr. Tom McDermott, CSC had just shy of 74 years to teach those who had the privilege of learning from him that liberating reality that the truth will make you strange.  This week, I am internalizing the loss of him and will write more next week appreciating the remarkable human that he was.

Teams of Rivals

Team of Rivals tells the story of how Abraham Lincoln invited political opponents to serve as trusted members of his cabinet.  He did not steamroll or manipulate them.  He listened to them and learned from them and the wisdom he gained from this interaction helped him navigate the American Civil War.

Each of us can decide to engage others who do not think how we think or believe what we believe, and so create our own team of rivals.  Doing so is a massively valuable and generous choice.

Institutions are strong and wise to the extent which they can call on the wisdom of teams of rivals.

Required Reading

The Ministry for the Future is a “climate fiction” novel that compellingly “plays forward” climate change.  (The book was published in 2020, and the plot begins in 2025.)  

The action centers around the “Ministry for the Future,” a global organization that advocates for future generations.

It is an ultimately hopeful book, that is also heart-breaking and life-changing.

Every human being should be offered a copy and encouraged to read it.

The Keynote Listener

We have all been to events with a keynote speaker. A recognized expert in a subject is given time to inform or inspire.

It is a known meeting structure. The speaker has the microphone. We sit and listen.  

Last week, I talked to a group that does things differently.  They organize gatherings around a keynote listener. (Very cool!) 

The keynote listener is a recognized expert in creating a gathering in which other people feel comfortable sharing their experience and wisdom. The keynote listener listens at this gathering, and then at the end of the meeting, synthesizes and summarizes so that the whole group can benefit from the wisdom of the group.

Are you a part of a group that could benefit from a keynote listener?