(This is the first of the Four Horsemen of Fixed Mindset, four mental stances that clip our potential, limit our intelligence, and stifle budding growth.)
When faced with a setback, a challenge, or a bit of critical feedback, we occasionally collapse into ourselves declaring: “You’re right. I suck.” We fixate on the negative so thoroughly, we are scarcely able to see anything else. We over-identify with the experience of failure.
This represents a subtle form of hiding. If I am fundamentally incapable of addressing the challenge with flexibility and insight, I am off the hook!
This mental stance distorts reality and side steps the wisdom on offer. Namely, it:
1) Over-identifies with the negative moment, hardening the (untrue) narrative that we are bad and incapable.
2) Blinds us from the positive buds of growth that already exist in the situation.
Let’s watch out for “you’re right, I suck.” Seeing and naming it drains it of its power.